An Amusement Club Christm-Festivus
by Macho Man Randy Quaid
Summary: The gang gathers around to celebrate Christmas at the club room, only to discover that they will be celebrating the mysterious holiday from the hit American series,"Seinfeld", the holiday of Festivus, instead. Two shows about nothing brought together in harmony! Starring: Akari, Kyoko, Yui, and Chinatsu! Featuring: Katsumi, and, um, maybe Kyoko's mom? Later? Who knows!
1. I: Chapter One

An Amusement Club Festivus

* * *

It was December 23, just two more days until Christmas Eve. And even though most people in the land were not Christian, the feeling of the holiday had penetrated the land with strong force and enraptured everyone in its holiday glow, and most glowing of all with the holiday spirit was Toshinou Kyoko.

"Ho, ho, ho!" she said to no one in particular as she made her way through the snow towards the Amusement Club hideaway. The school closed up yesterday, but that didn't stop her. The way Kyoko saw it, the Amusement Club hut was her property not the school's. It wasn't like they were using it and besides she was in possession of the key. That made her the legal guardian. Finder's keepers, as her mother used to say. She learned a lot from her mother, a lot of valuable life lessons. Kyoko figured that after the party she should go and get her mother something to show her her own appreciation. Hopefully, Takami will return from her annual trip across the country in time for the holiday, she usually does.

Yes, the party. That is what she should focus on now. Getting the party together. The "Christmas" party.

She opened the door and went in to set-up. She checked the time, and found thatch had a half-hour before everyone got here. She had the sign she made herself. She also had the Christmas tree holder. Yui was bringing the metal pole from her father's workshop.

"Why do we need a metal pole for our Christmas party?"

"We don't we need it for our 'holiday' party!" Kyoko replied. Yui squinted trying to figure out the girl's angle, but was unable and acquised. Kyoko loved it that Yui didn't bother to really question anything she did anymore.

Kyoko also set up the egg-nog drink to bring that western flair to the party. This is gonna be the best Christmas party ever!" Kyoko cheered, but corrected herself, "Oops, I mean-"

She was interrupted by the crash of the door sliding open. Yui and Akari entered. "Oh, Kyoko!" Yui waved. "Merry Christmas," Akari greeted. Kyoko greeted them back, "Happy Holidays, Yui and Akari."

"I brought the, um, metal pole," Yui said, pointing to the thing in her hand. Akari held the other end.

Kyoko studied it and pouted. "Buuu," she said, "I wanted it to be bigger. What kind of a Festivus pole is this?"

"What gratitude is that?" Yui snipped back. "I went through a lot of trouble to get this pole out of my father's garage."

Akari asked the more obvious question, "Festivus?" Akari said, "What is 'Festivus', Kyoko-chan?"

"Oops," Kyoko covered her mouth at the slip. Se let the cat out of the bag by mistake. "Oh, well,I was waiting for everyone here to spring this on you-"

"Ah, I should've expected this much," Yui said.

"Don't worry, this will be great! Y'see, it's a third winter holiday. You know how there's Christmas, and in the West, they have Hannukah, too? Well, you see, those two holidays are very religious and also commercial, so in America-"

"I'm here with the snacks!" Chinatsu interrupted as she came in. "Eh?" She stopped dead in her tracks as she saw the pole in the room. "Umm… what's going on? What kind of a tree is that?"

"It's not a tree, Chinatsu-chan, "Kyoko continued, "It's a Festivus pole!"

"Festivus?"

"Yeah," Akari added, "It's some other holiday apparently. Kyoko was just telling us the origins until you walked in."

Chinatsu put the snacks on the table and sat down with the rest. Kyoko backtracked for Chinatsu, then went on to explain the magic of Festivus. If one considers putting a pole of steel in the middle of their house magical.

"There's Christmas, Hannukah," she concluded, "and a Festivus for the rest of us! It's gonna be great!" Kyoko smiled.

"So, what's the difference between a Christmas celebration and a Festivus one?" Akari asked.

There are certain rituals to Festivus, which we will get into as we go along!" Kyoko said, "They're all about building bonds and seeking to improve yourself and others. I also brought some sandwiches," Kyoko said, pulling food in tupperware containers out of her red bag, "and some noodle soup for the Festivus dinner! And then we'll get into the rituals," Kyoko smiled. "This sounds like it's gonna be tiring," Yui and Chinatsu said.

"I think it's gonna be fun!" Akari said.

'Ah, thanks Akari-chan! Y'see," she said as she put her arm around the redhead, "Akari is the only one in the spirit of the winter solstice! You two should try being more like her!"

"Thank you, Kyoko-chan!"

"She's too good a girl," the other two thought to themselves.

"As long as it is not TOO long, Kyoko-chan!" Akari said. Kyoko shrugged, "It shouldn't be! Why, Akari-chan?"

Akari smiled as the spirit of the holidays came over her. "I'm meeting Katsumi to go out with her and her friends for their Christmas thing!" Chinatsu crushed her eggnog cup in her hand.

"Gah!" Yui said to Chinatsu, "Ae you okay?"

"Yeah," she replied, "Yeah it's nothing." 'Katsumi! Katsumi! Always Katsumi!' she growled.

"Don't worry, you'll have time for your girlfriend, Akari!" Kyoko chuckled, "First, though, let's eat the Festivus dinner, and we'll dive right in."

* * *

To Be Continued, Maybe!

 **A/N:**

Not my usual quality, I know, but I just wanted to get something out for the holiday season. And i thought that the Amusement Club girls celebrating Festivus would be pretty funny. I'm gonna get into the actual Festivus celebration in the next chapter where they air their grievances and do the feats of strength. Or I might not write the next chapter at all and this may join Blue Spider's Web as a member of the list of stories that will never be finished lol.

We shall see. After all Festivus is a time for miracles! Either way, Merry Christmas, Happy Hannukah, Happy New Year, and of course, Happy Festivus! 


	2. II: The Airing of the Grievances

Chapter 2: The Airing of Grievances:

"Ah," Yui yelped as Kyoko smacked the sandwich out of her hand. "What was that for? I thought it was time to eat?"

"No," Kyoko explained, "Before we engage in the Festivus dinner, we first undergo the first annual tradition of the Festivus holiday - the airing of the grievances!"

"Eh?" the other three shrugged, "The airing of the grievances?"

"What is that?" Akari asked.

Kyoko grinned, "This is the best thing! So, what we do is we all take turns telling off everyone at the dinner table how they have severely upset or disappointed you in the past year! No holding back!"

"What?" Chinatsu asked, "What's the point of that?"

'Yeah," Yui added, "That sounds like a horrible way to celebrate the Christmas season! Isn't it about togetherness and bonding?"

"This isn't Christmas," Kyoko snapped her finger as she explained matter-of-factly, "It's Festivus! And it is about that! You see, where Christmas glitters over it with the ol' 'Jeebus is commin' to save us' so look busy' nonsense, Festivus is about promoting honesty and appropriate constructive criticism so people can then improve. It's about developing yourself!"

"Okay-" Akari said, "I guess that makes sense!"

"You say this isn't Christmas, but you're wearing a santa hat and coat," Yui pointed out. "Please, Yui!" Kyoko said, "Wait your turn! To be honest, you've been more than prepared for this all your life! Heh heh!" Yui sighed.

"Alnd after we air grievances, we can eat?" Chinatsu asked.

Kyoko nodded, "Okay," she started, "I'll go first since I am the patriarch of this meeting! I have a lot of issues with a ll of you," she pointed at them, "and I'm gonna let you know about 'em!"

"First off, YUI!" she pointed at the raven-haired girl. "Eh?" Yui asked. "What grievances do you have against me?"

"You've been hitting me WAY TOO MUCH this year! Like all the time! You're violence is a big problem! And plus, you're too asexual! Seriously, find yourself a girlfriend already! Akari has one, and she doesn't have any presence!"

"Eh!" Akari interjected, "Why are you bringing me into this!"

'Hmmm," Chinatsu thought as Kyoko berated Yui about not having a girlfriend. "Oh, Chinatsu-chan!" the visionary Yui pleaded as she grapsed Chinatsu's hand, "Kyoko pointed out to me just how lonely I was and I am now finally realizing it. Please save me from this loneliness."

"I could get behind this holiday," Chinatsu said to herself.

Back in reality, Yui was busy affirming Kyoko's previous point, by locking Kyoko in some sort of a headlock. "Gahh!" Kyoko yelped in pain. "My love life," Yui explained, "is none of your business! If you didn't annoy me so much, I wouldn't have to do this to you, but you never learn!"

"Gah! You're skipping a lot of steps!" Kyoko let out. Yui finally released her.

"Okay, Chinatsu-chan!" Kyoko pointed to her. "Eh?" Chinatsu snapped out of her little fantasy.

"You still don't recognize my feelings for you! Can't you see? Can't you see we were MADE for each other!" Chinatsu just looked at her with a deadpanned expression.

"Here's my grievance," she said, "You're an idiot! And I would love for you to stop being so later in the New Year."

"And finally, Akari," she pointed to her."Eh? What could have against me!"

"You have a girlfriend and everything, but you still have very little presence! And this year you haven't even been trying to fix it!"

"Eh!" Akari exclaimed, "That's not my fault!"

"And also, you, um, haven't changed your hairstyle at ALL!"

'EH!" Akari exclaimed again. "She's just scraping the bottom of the barrel now," Yui thought to herself.

"And finally!" Kyoko stood up, "NONE of you here have recognized the supremacy of Mirakurun and accepted her as your dear Lord and Savior! You have all failed again to take Mirakurun in your lives! I expect much better from all of YOU," she pointed at all of them again, "in the New Year, okay?" Three deadpanned expressions responded to her.

"So, my turn, right?" Yui said. Kyoko shook her, "Nope! It's Akari's turn!"

"Eh?" They both let out, "Why does she get to go?" "Why do I have to go?"

"Because you and Chinatsu already aired your grievances at me! You skipped your turn. So now, you have to wait until next year to air your grievances." She stuck her tongue out at them.

"What a shame," Chinatsu said semi-sarcastically, but semi-seriously.

"You're definitely making that up!" Yui said. "But then again, I'm also pretty confident that you're making this entire day up!"

"No I'm not! It's real! It was created by a TV show in America back in the 90s!" Kyoko explained.

'Do I really have to go, Kyoko?" Akari asked. Kyoko nodded, "Yes, Akari! You have to go. If you don't go, then Festivus cannot continue on and we can't eat our supper!"

"Just say something Akari so we can end this thing," Yui said.

"Well, okay," Akari said, "I do have to hurry up so I can go out with Katsumi-"

Again, Chinatsu crushed the cup of eggnog in her hand, but Akari was too preoccupied with the thought of going out for a Christmas night on the town with her perfect girlfriend.

"I don't really have any ideas though," Akari said. "Maybe," Chinatsu said, "You can air some grievances about someone who is not here, like maybe, y'know, a loved one perhaps, or maybe a girlfriend, or-"

"No," Kyoko cut her off, " Has to be confined to the dinner guests."

'Damn it, senpai!' Chinatsu silently mouthed off.

"Come on, Akari-chan!" Kyoko edged her on, "Let out all your frustrations! Don't hold back!"

"Okay, here it goes," Akari said, "You guys," Akari pointed. Kyoko's eyes widened, 'Yes!' she thought, 'We're gonna see the dark side of Akari-chan!' Akari finally let out, "you guys need to even more of my friends in the future!"

"Yea-! Eh? Wait? What?" Kyoko stopped. The other two also looked at her oddly. It was like the King's Game all over again. 'She's too nice!' they all thought.

They were interrupted by the sound of Akari's cellphone beeping. Akari answered it with an adorable smile, "Hello Katsu-chan!"

Again, Chinatsu crushed another cup of eggnog in her hand. "Gah!" Yui said as she barely managed to avert the flying liquid, "What is it with you, Chinatsu!"

'Sorry, senpai! I seem to keep suffering from these violent twitches!"

"Hmm," Akari nodded, "I'm still with my friends! … Oh you don't have to go so out of your way, Katsu-chah…. Ah, you're so sweet! … No, I love you more…No, I you more!-"

For a minute Chinatsu thought she was going to be violently ill. Turning to Yui, she made a mock gag reflex mocking the conversation. Yui just looked at her confusedly.

"Alrigh," Akari continued the conversation, "I'll see you then. Bye, bye!" She hung up the phone.

"Was that your waif, Akari?" Kyoko asked. Akari nodded, "Mmm, she's gonna come pick me up in a bit!"

"here's a grievance," Chinatsu whispered to herself, turning away a bit from Akari so she couldn't hear, "maybe not talk about that damn girlfriend of yours so much-"

"Sorry," Akari turned to her, "did you say something Chinatsu-chan?"

"Oh, nothing," Chinatsu denied it. "I was just thinking of last minute gift ideas!"

"Speaking of which," Yui continued, "what are you guys doing for Christmas anyway?"

Thus, the airing of grievances ended, and the group enjoyed their supper with a talk about their holiday plans until Kyoko decided it was time to engage in the final rite of the Festivus holiday.

* * *

 **A/N:**

So, chapter two! It's a Festivus miracle! Lol. Anyway, I didn't actually intend this for this to turn into an Akari x Katsumi story, but it looks like it's turning out that way. I'm honestly just winging this trying to spread some Yuru Yuri yuletide joy, so I'm not too worried about plot. I was going to continue writing for another hour and a half or so, but alas I must stop as it is Christmas Eve and unfortunately, I have to go to the annual consumption of human flesh and blood which Christians call "Mass" to mark the Winter Solstice, or else Satan wins or something! Lol. As you can probably tell already by some of the contents of the story, I'm not too big into the whole "Jesus Thing" despite my love for the season. I just kind of feel that religion really RUINS Christmas, although I do love the religious Christmas hymns more than the secular songs. That's religion's only real contribution to the season, I feel. I know that may sound a bit paradoxical and it probably is, but I don't know, just an interesting little thing about my personality. And I do hope I'm not offending anybody out there reading this, although for some reason I don't think many people who read Yuru Yuri are major Christ followers, so I probably don't have to worry! LOL

Anyway, time to log off as it's time to go, and I'm beginning to get the Irish evil eye stares from my folks! Lol! Chapter three will be shortly. Merry Xmas!


	3. III: Amusement Club Christmas Plans

**PREVIOUSLY:**

"here's a grievance," Chinatsu whispered to herself, turning away a bit from Akari so she couldn't hear, "maybe not talk about that damn girlfriend of yours so much-"

"Sorry," Akari turned to her, "did you say something Chinatsu-chan?"

"Oh, nothing," Chinatsu denied it. "I was just thinking of last minute gift ideas!"

"Speaking of which," Yui continued, "what are you guys doing for Christmas anyway?

* * *

 **Chapter Three: The Amusement Club Christmas Plans**

"Well," Akari said, "Tonight, Katsumi and I are going to eat out with her kendo friends! After that, we're going to go walking by the river together and maybe go ice-skating! I can't wait!"

"I wanna die!" Chinatsu whispered to herself again. Yui replied, "You're really good at the ice-skating, too, right?" Akari nodded, "Yeah, my sister taught me. Of course, Christmas Eve, our parents will all be hanging out, so we will all be together as usual," Akari smiled.

Yui nodded, "Of course!"

"Your parents meet up every Christmas Eve?" Chinatsu asked. Yui nodded, "Yeah all our parents are childhood friends, remember, so they always make the effort to meet Christmas Eve and give each other gifts."

"And we get gifts, too!" Kyoko added, "From Akari's mother, and Yui's mother! it's like aunts visiting!"

"Ah, that's cool!" Chinatsu commented. "It's too bad my mother didn't grow up with your mothers!"

"Yeah, but you can come and hang out with us anyway, Chinatsu-chan! We usually leave early to go back to Yui's place anyway!"

"Do you spend Christmas Day together as well?"

"Not really," Yui said, "I'm way too busy that day."

"Yeah," Kyoko said, "Me too. My mother and I go to see some extended family in the city, and most of my family hates each other, so we are going all around the place because nobody wants to get under the same roof!"

"Ah, I see. That's too bad," Chinatsu said. Kyoko nodded. "Why doesn't your family like each other?" Chinatsu asked.

"Oh, the Toshinou family holds grudges about anything and everything. I know my mother and one of my cousins don't talk because my mother thinks that "Legend of the North Star Fist" is one of the greatest shows ever made and my aunt doesn't think it's so great!"

"Um, what?" Chinatsu said, "How is that important?"

"Well, my mother and cousin both insist the other holds the positions that they do entirely to spite the other! Oh, and two of my uncles never see each other because the one insists that the other owes him 200 yen from a card game twenty years ago, and the other uncle insists he re-payed him with a free lunch, but my uncle doesn't think it counts!"

"200 yen?" they all interjected. Chinatsu said, "They're fighting over 200 yen? That's not a lot of money!"

Kyoko shrugged, "I know, but it's supposedly about the principal of the thing."

"Well," Chinatsu said, thinking about all the girl just told her, "I must apologize to you, senpai. Since we met I've wondered why the hell you had to be so weird, but really, after hearing only a small tidbit of you family's history, it's commendable how normal you actually are!" Kyoko chuckled. Rubbing the back of her head with a huge grin, she thanked Chinatsu for her praise.

"Speaking of Takami-san," Yui said, "Is she back yet?"

"Nmm," Kyoko shook her head, "But she will be tonight I think with gifts galore!" she smiled.

"What do you mean?" Chinatsu asked. Kyoko answered, "Oh, it's a thing my mother does. Every year for a couple of weeks, she takes off around the country to go and find the best deals on Christmas gifts!"

"Ummm, what?"

"Yeah, I know it's weird!" Kyoko replied, "But she always left me in either Yui or Akari's parents' custody, so I was never alone until this year because now I'm old enough! And by the time she returned, she had so many gifts for me, you couldn't even see the floor! So it is all worth it!"

"Ah, well," Chinatsu said, "That's sweet, I guess!"

'Jeez,' Chinatsu thought furtively, 'First her extended family and now this about her mother-? Yet another piece of the puzzle falls into place!'

"Who are you spending Christmas Day with this year, Yui-chan?" Kyoko asked.

"Ugh, both," she moaned, "I have to see both of my parents for Christmas."

"Eh?" Chinatsu asked, "What do you mean, senpai? That's obvious, isn't it?"

"Oh, that's right," Akari added, "You don't know, Chinatsu-chan!"

"Know what?"

"My parents aren't together, Chinatsu-chan," Yui replied,"They're divorced!"

Chinatsu gasped, "Eh!? What!? Divorced?"

Yui nodded. "Yeah, they got divorced a few years back, when I was ten." Chinatsu, nearly brought to the brink of tears, hugged her beloved senpai in an attempt to console her and alleviate what she believed to be a closeted burden ripping her apart. "Oh my God!" she said as she hugged her dear senpai. "That's so horrible, Yui-senpai! That must've been so difficult for you! I hate the idea of you having to suffer the hardships of a broken home!"

"Heh, heh," Yui chuckled as she pet her affectionate younger, "It's not a big deal, really, Chinatsu-chan! I'm fine with it! My parents don't hate each other at all. They get along. It's just that they never loved each other. They're still friends, though."

Akari nodded. "Yes, I have to say I was pretty sad for you at the time, Yui-chan, but I'm glad it all worked out in the end."

"Yes, yes," Kyoko nodded, "It's better that they live apart and are both happy rather than together and miserable, right?" Yui nodded. "Yes, I feel the same way, too," she said. Kyoko continued, "I know my mother was especially happy for your mother. Heck, she was so happy your mother could finally be happy again, she was celebrating when the divorce happened!" Kyoko smiled at what she thought was an innocent moment, but the other three saw it a little differently. 'That doesn't sound like support,' they thought, 'Sounds more like jubilation!'

Yui leaned back a bit to stretch, "My only bother about it all is that on holidays I have to separate the day between them and it can get exhausting! I spend the morning with my father and some of his family and then I visit my mother and her family in the evening. I have to eat two suppers, and I can never finish it around the time I get to my mother's time and I always feel a little bad about it."

"Wait a minute! More food!?" Kyoko said, "You eat TWO dinners!" Yui nodded, "Yeah, because I have two suppers I have to go to."

"How after these four years have I only heard about this now!?" Kyoko asked as if she just found out her friend was holding out money or some sort of treasure on her. Yui just shrugged, and said, "I never really thought it was anything that major; just a trivial holiday misfortune."

"Wow! I'm jealous!" Kyoko said, "HOW could you call that a misfortune!? TWO dinners!? Man, I wish my parents would get divorced so I could do that!"

"Um, you only have one parent," Yui retorted. Kyoko snapped her finger, "You're right! Okay how about this! I'll get my mother a spouse to marry then they can divorce! Then, I'll have two dinners to eat!"

"That plan leaves a lot to chance!"

"Heh heh," Kyoko chuckled as she mused over a funny thought, "How about my mom marries yours!" she smiled.

"Eh?" Yui retorted in partial shock, "Not very likely!"

"Anyway," Chinatsu resumed with the topic at hand, "What are you doing for Christmas, Akari-chan?"

"Oh, well, nothing out of the ordinary!" Akari said, smiling as she rubbed the back of her head, "My family and I open the presents on Christmas morning, some of my cousins and uncles and aunts come over, and we all eat together, talk about stuff, maybe watch a movie, and that's pretty much it."

The pinkette smiled, "Just like Akari-chan to have such a normal Christmas!" Chinatsu said. Akari chuckled. "Thanks."

"And of course," the redhead continued," Katsumi-chan will be coming over dessert this year!" Akari smiled again. Chinatsu growled, tired of that name the first moment it was uttered today and sicker of it still. "What?" she grimaced.

"Yeah," Akari said, "I asked my mother if it was okay and she said yes! I can't wait for her to meet everyone!"

"Wouldn't you be a little fed up with her by now?" Chinatsu sulked, "Having seen her twice already!"

"Eh? No, of course not!" Akari said, hugging herself as if her girlfriend were with her. "I can't wait to be with Katsu-chan! Besides we spend too much time apart as it is."

Chinatsu nearly fell in the floor ready to throw up from all of Akari's gushing. "Are you alright, Chinatsu-chan?" Akari asked as her friend made some gag noises. "Yeah, it's probably just this eggnog!" she said.

'It would've been nice if I were invited to your house for Christmas, you know, your BEST FRIEND!' she thought, but kept her complaint concealed. "Wouldn't she spending Christmas with her own family," Yui asked. Akari nodded, "Yes, she will in the morning, but her mother said it was okay after they had their plum pudding."

"Plum pudding?" Kyoko repeated the English word, and asked, "What is plum pudding, Akari?" Akari said, "It's some Irish food they eat. Her mother's family  
brings it over when they come to Japan for Christmas." Chinatsu, still sulking, crossed her arms, and thought, 'If only her mother had stayed over there and Katsumi were never born!' Chinatsu enjoyed the idea of there existing an alternate universe out there where this entire conversation never happened.

There was a knock at the door, and Akari, her heart fluttering, went to answer it. Sure enough it was, "Katsu-chan! Speak of the devil!"

Chinatsu could not help but chuckle at the idiom. '-the devil is right.'

"Hello Akari-chan," she greeted her, followed by a quick kiss, which caused the pinkette to go red and steam with anger. "Hello everyone," Katsumi greeted the Amusement Club as they waved. Chinatsu waved along reluctantly. She didn't like Katsumi, in case it wasn't obvious by this point.

Katsumi's eyes caught the metal pole standing in the middle of the room for no discernible reason obvious to her. Pointing to it, she asked, "What's with the pole?"

"You like it?" Kyoko grinned, "That's our Festivus pole! We're celebrating Festivus!"

"Um, Festivus?" Katsumi asked, "What's Festivus?"

Yui answered, "It's some sort of made up holiday from an American television show. Kyoko is insisting it's a real holiday."

"Oh, well, that's certainly like you, Toshinou-senpai!" Katsumi said to the blonde who accepted what she felt as a compliment.

"What's it about?" Katsumi asked, partially out of politeness, partially out of curiosity. "You don't have to feel forced to ask her out of politeness, Katsumi-san," Yui answered for her, "It's not about anything!"

"Buuu-! You're such as Festivus grinch, Yui!" Kyoko pouted, "Have you not learned ANY of the lessons of Festivus?"

"No," Yui replied sternly, "because there are no lessons to learn."

"Well, anyway," Katsumi turned to Akari. As interesting as the concept of Festivus was, it wasn't more interesting to her than her beloved girlfriend. "Are you ready to go now?" she smiled. Akari smiled, too, and nodded, "I'm ready!" It was then that Katsumi caught Chinatsu's gaze. "Hey Chinatsu-san," Katsumi greeted, "How are you?"

"I'm fine, Katsumi-san," Chinatsu replied through her teeth, "I'm just fine. You're looking well."

"Thank you," Katsumi said, "So, are you, um-," she scratched the side of her face, "-are you doing anything different with your hair or-?"

"Hmm? Oh no!" the pinkette replied, "This is how I always wear it."

'Is she knocking my hair or something?' Chinatsu thought, 'Her hair isn't so great!'

"So, you and Akari are going out, huh?"

"Yes, that's the plan," Katsumi replied. Chinatsu nodded, "Well, have a lot of fun, you two!" she tried to mean it.

Akari got up to go. "WAIT!" the blonde eccentric interrupted. Katsumi along with Akari and the rest of the Amusement Club turned back toward the otaku to see what was the subject of this latest outburst. Once she was certain that she had everyone's attention, Kyoko continued, "You can't go yet, Akari-chan, because Festivus is not yet over!"

"What do you mean, Kyoko-chan?" Akari asked. Katsumi looked on in confusion. "Well, yeah," Yui interjected, "It's not midnight, which I'd imagi-wait!" Yui interrupted herself as a terrifying prospect just slipped into her mind, "don't TELL me we have to be stuck in this room until midnight because I will leave right now if that's the case!"

Kyoko shuck her head, "No, don't worry, you won't! Festivus doesn't end at midnight! It could end before or after…"

"Quit being cryptic and just tell us," Chinatsu said in desperation. She, too, wanted to leave this room in a hurry, now even less motivated than she was before.

But Kyoko remained defiant and undaunted. Laughing, she announced the next and final phase in the Festivus tradition, and the most dauting was saved for last. "Y'see," Kyoko said, "there's one last ritual to perform-"

* * *

To be continued in: THE FESTIVUS FEATS OF STRENGTH!

* * *

 **A/N:** Well, another Christmas Day has passed as has New Year. I know it is a bit late to be still working on a Christmas special, but I like this story so I am going to finish it anyway. There's only one last chapter to do anyway, and it is quick and fun to write, as well as reminds me how much I miss working with Katsumi! I must get Rum Raisin finished so I can move on to reboot White Day! and write it properly. On top of it all; however, Christmastime isn't over! There are twelve days to Christmas, remember? And I am in Ireland on vacation right now where Twelfth Night is still a big deal! So, I feel justified in continuing this story, and besides, the completed version can always be revisited next year for any of you Christmas Day purists!

And what about some of those revelations? The Toshinou family is MAD, huh? Lol! And you have Yui the child of a divorce; how sad! Doesn't it just make you want to hug her tight? Lol. And finally, Katsumi is sending Christmas with some of her foreign family but still has some time for her precious girlfriend, much to Chinatsu's dismay. And nobody cares about what Chinatsu is doing! lol!

Anyway, the tension is there and it will all bubble over during "The Feats of Strength" trial! What is "The Feats of Strength"? Well, you'll find out next time! So, until then, I just want to wish all of you another Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! See you next time!


	4. IV: The Festivus Feats of Strength

"Alright!" Kyoko explained as she stretched, readying herself for what was to come, "You see girls, what Festivus is REALLY all about is the passing of the torch from one generation to the next!"

The other four met her statement with confusion. "Okay…? We're all of the same generation though?" Chinatsu asked. Kyoko continued as if nobody had said anything. "The Festivus Feats of Strength is a celebration of this fact! So, the rule is that someone must wrestle the patriarch, and since I am the leader of the Amusement Cub that title belongs to me," Kyoko grinned rather smugly as she pointed at herself, sparking a series of groans from the other members. Kyoko continued, "and Festivus shall not end until I am wrestled and pinned!"

Kyoko's smug grin quickly dissipated once Yui jumped up, fully reinvigorated. "Alright!" she said, "Now, this Festivus thing is beginning to appeal to me. So," she cracked her knuckles, "should we do it over here on the floor, or-?"

"Um, okay, Yui-chan-" Kyoko interrupted her, "Um, you can't do it!"

"Eh? Why not?" Yui said, crossing her arms. Kyoko elaborated, "Well, you do it all the time! It wouldn't be very festive, I don't think! Heh heh!" Yui groaned as she sat back down, detecting that she wouldn't win this. Kyoko looked around, "No, I think it should be somebody that doesn't do it very often, so Akari!"

"Eh?" the redhead gasped as Kyoko pointed to her. 'Wh-why me? I don't want to!" she shook her head and hands. Katsumi crossed her hands, and chuckled wildly at the thought of Akari in a fight with anyone. 'That would be so adorable."

Kyoko continued, "C'mon Akari! You'll be fine! Just let loose all that inner aggression you have from not being noticed enough and really let me have it!"

"N-n-no, Kyoko-chan! I don't have any inner aggression really!" she insisted, "I don't want to fight!"

"Yeah, she won't fight!" Katsumi said, putting her arms around her, "She's just too nice!" Akari smiled while Chinatsu scowled more and more intensely. She had a half a mind to tell the two not to show so much affection in public, but she repressed the urge.

"Aww, come on, Akari-chan! Someone needs to take me down or else Festivus can't end, and you won't be able to go out on your date!" Still Akari shook her head.

"Ah well," Kyoko said, crossing her arms again, "then it can't be helped, since Akari refuses to fight me, then Festivus must go on forever!"

Yui retorted, "there's more than one person here in fighting condition."

Katsumi stepped forward, "Look," she said, "I'll fight you on Akari's behalf! Besides, I can't be letting my girlfriend fall into harm's ways, anyway!" She turned back to her beloved, "Right, sweetie!" She winked at her.

Finally, Chinatsu could take it no more.

"Umm," Kyoko mumbled, "I don't think it would be fair if an experienced kendo player took me on," she wiped away her sweat mark.

"No!" Chinatsu said, standing up with her hand raised, getting the attention of the room. "I'll do it!" she said.

"Oh, yes! Chinatsu-chan! I can work with that!"

"Oh, okay," Katsumi stepped back as she nodded, "Good luck, Chinatsu!"

"Thanks," Chinatsu forced herself to bark out, refraining her snarl as she walked out onto the floor space with Kyoko. But she did not restrain herself in her own mind. While Kyoko went about appointing Yui the referee, Chinatsu stared the girl down through the corner of her eye. 'Good luck!' she thought in a sarcastic inner voice which she thought Katsumi sounded like. 'I'll show YOU good luck, you patronizing little cun-'

"Okay!" Kyoko declared loudly, interrupting Chinatsu's thoughts, keeping the story tame. "Chinatsu-chan-!"

"Yes?"

Here's how it's gonna go okay?" she said as she crouched into a basic grappling stance. "I am the patriarch, right? So you have to pin me to win! Now, you can also get me to tap or TKO me…"

Chinatsu didn't pay attention to the rules. Instead, she was again distracted by Katsumi's whispering. With hands wrapped around her, Katsumi was clearly whispering to Akari, mentioning something about 'forms' and other fighting terms.

'I bet she's making fun of me to Akari! Making fun of my form! Well, excuse me if I'm actually like a girl and don't get into fights all that often, Ms. Butch! Ms. Pretends-to-"  
"Chinatsu!" Kyoko said, "Chinatsu are you listening?"

"Eh!? What!?" Chinatsu barked, turning her attention back to the Feats of Strength. "Yeah! Yeah!" she said, "I'm ready! Let's do it!"

"Okay," Yui said, her arms pared apart to separate the two, "Ready!" She raised her hand. "Go!" she said as she brought it down. The match was officially on.

"Hehe," Kyoko, still in her fighting stance, wagged her finger as she said, "Now, since you're my kouhai, I won't be to rough on you, Chinatsu-chan, but don't think I won't let yo-AGHHHH!"

Chinatsu swiftly kicked Kyoko right in the center of her face as hard she possibly could. Little did Katsumi know that by coming here and interacting with Akari as much as she did that she sentenced Kyoko to her doom, as all of her repressed aggression suddenly went channeling out of Chinatsu's body and descended right in the epicenter of the poor blonde otaku's beautiful face, hitting her with such momentum and force that it sent her flying and spinning across the space. For Kyoko, barely conscious, everything appeared as if it was happening in slow-motion. And for what must've been a only a brief second in time but for Kyoko felt an eternity, everything appeared to make sense. She achieved a heightened state of consciousness and all of the universe appeared as one, unified singularity. She teared, moved by the beauty of it all, and also by the immense pain that suddenly rushed itself upon her as she finally impacted hard on the floor and rolled to a halt, to the gasp of the entire room.

And Chinatsu, still with a little reserve aggression still in her, would've went in for a few punches and jabs, but the official declared the fight over.

"Huh? I won already?" Chinatsu asked.

"Yeah, yeah!" Yui said going over to Kyoko, "You won, Chinatsu-chan! Festivus is over!" But Yui didn't have much time to celebrate it as she had to attend to her fallen friend, who dazed and confused, sat up crouched, holding her hands to her face.

"Ahhhhh…" she moaned as she hid her face with her hands. "Kyoko-chan! Are you okay?" Yui said, crouching down beside her. "Yeah, yeah!" Kyoko said as she waved it off dismissively with one hand, clutching her face with the next, "Agh! But my nose!" Kyoko then whimpered, "I think my nose is broken!" Yui took her hands off her face, and sure enough, it was quite a sight.

"Ah!" Akari gasped. She ran towards her and stood on her knees beside Yui. "Kyoko-chan! Are you okay?" Chinatsu also moved closer. She remained standing, but bent down to investigate herself. Sure enough, she did do quite some unnecessary damage to her senpai's face, and feared that in a moment of lost control maybe crossed a threshold.

"Boy!" Katsumi said, stepping closer and bending down to get a closer look. "That is one wound! I mean that will leave a mark!"

"Thanks for your assessment, doctor!" Chinatsu huffed to herself.

"Huh?" Katsumi asked, "You say something?" Chinatsu shook her head, "No. Nothing."

Does it hurt when I do this?" Yui touched Kyoko's nose, just lightly, to assess the damage. Kyoko flinched, but admitted that it didn't too hard.

"Is it broken?" she asked. Katsumi, moving in herself, shook her head, "No! It's fine, I think, Toshinou-senpai."

Chinatsu stood there, arms crossed. Feeling mad still, but also a little bad and guilty for what she had done.

"Here," Katsumi said, pulling her bag over and rummaging through it, "I have some band-aids and some disinfectant."

"Ah, thanks, Kato-san," Yui said, accepting them as she dabbed proceeded to dab and bandage up her friend. "Eh? Amazing Katsu-chan!" Akari commended her, "Why do you have these?"

"Oh, it's nothing," Katsumi waved it off. "We sometimes have accidents on the Kendo Club, you know. I've been delegated medical supply girl, so it's my job to bring medical supplies and the such to the club, and so I just always have them on me."

'Miss-Perfect!' Chinatsu snarled to herself.

The group dabbed Kyoko with the disinfectant, cleaned Kyoko up, and applied the bandage. "Wow, Yoshiwaka-san!" Katsumi turned back to Chinatsu. "You really did a number on her, huh?"

"Hey!" she barked at her, "I didn't mean to, okay!" 'I was imagining myself kicking you, so really this is all YOUR fault!' she thought.

"You didn't have to kick me so hard, Chinatsu-chan!" Kyoko whimpered, doing her best to hold back her tears, "I was only playing around!"

She pouted, "I know. I'm sorry, senpai. I didn't mean it, honest!" She frowned, as she did legitimately feel bad. Kyoko was right. She deserved all the slaps and jabs that Yui and herself gave her on a regular basis for being such an irritant, but she didn't deserve any real harm. She was harmless enough. She felt so bad that she nearly didn't cringe at Akari calling her girlfriend that stupid pet name of hers. Almost.

"Hey, Katsu-chan," Akari said. "Hm?" Katsumi replied, "What is it Akari-chan?"

"I really hate to do this," Akari said, "but maybe we should cancel our date tonight so I can stay and help take care of Kyoko-chan!"

"Eh?" Chinatsu let out to herself.

"Eh? But Akari-chan," Katsumi pouted, "We were looking forward to it all week!"

'"I know, but I don't want to leave Kyoko-chan if she might be hurt!"

"Yeah," Chinatsu pointed out, "Friends should stick together after all." She smirked. Against her will and better judgment, Chinatsu couldn't help but feel a slight burst of happiness at the prospect of Akari not leaving to date Katsumi and instead sounding the rest of the evening with the crew.

"No, no!" Kyoko interjected, "Please, Akari-chan! Go on your date! Don't mind me!"

"Are you sure, Kyoko-chan?"

"yeah, senpai, are you sure?" Chinatsu asked, "I mean because Akari will stay and help no bother. Right, Akari?"

Akari nodded back to her, "Yeah! Of course!" Chinatsu's side smile was quickly dissipated as she noticed Katsumi giving her a glare. She looked away and tried to feign ignorance.

"What?" Yui said, also regarding Chinatsu somewhat suspiciously. "No, that's not necessary, Akari-chan, we can manage from here. You go out on your date."

Kyoko nodded, "Yes, Akari-chan! I'll be alright. If you have the chance to get some hot sexy action tonight, don't let me interfere!"

"EHHHHH!?" Akari and Katsumi gasped simultaneously as their faces reddened.

"Kyoko-chan!" Akari said, fake punching her, "Don't SAY such embarrassing things! My girlfriend is right here and you're embarrassing me!" Kyoko laughed as she held her arm out to hold back Akari's little onslaught.

"Ah good," Yui said, "See, Akari? She's well!"

Akari accepted this. "Alright, well, if you're sure, we're going to go-"

"Yes! Yes!" the two senpais said, "Go!" Akari smiled, "Okay! Thanks guys!"

Akari and Katsumi got up and head towards the door. "Just have her back by 9:00 and sharp!" Kyoko exclaimed. "What are you? Her mother?" Yui retorted.

As Chinatsu watched the pairing walk away, she looked at Kyoko and grimaced. 'I should have kicked her harder!'

* * *

 **A/N:**

Christmas may be over, but Festivus is in overdrive carrying into the new year! Since writing this, I've been told that the Japanese don't hold Christmas as highly as Westerners and the way I've depicted Christmas here is highly Western. But, you know, it's my story, so it stands! Lol.

Also, I just want to address some confusion - the plot here has nothing to do with "White Day". It's not a continuation of that story by any means, it's its own thing. The only thing they have in common is that Katsumi is in it and is Akari's girlfriend. Other than that, it is an independent entity. Nothing that happened in "White Day" affects this story or vice-versa. And yes, I do plan to get back to "White Day" eventually, please stop asking!

With that said, even though it's February, Happy New Year, I hope it's a great yuri-ful year for all of you. Peace out!


End file.
